When we came back from our year in Africa we had to start our lives in America all over again, so we were incredibly grateful that my parents allowed us to stay with them while we got our feet back on the ground. Regaining all the momentum that we had lost in our one year sabbatical was not as easy as we anticipated, and it took us a while to establish a steady groove in our home life, work life, and our finances. Because of this, there was little talk about babies until at least a year had past after our return. We maintained the idea that if a surprise baby were to come our way, we'd be more than thrilled, but it wasn't until we hit the one year mark that we "officially" started trying for a baby.
When we didn't get pregnant right away, I was a little disappointed, but I knew that for some people it just took a little better planning, and a little more time, so I wasn't worried. We continued to try on and off for the next couple of years, but still nothing. I reasoned with myself that it was because our "official" efforts were so sporatic, and that it was just a matter of timing everything perfectly, but in my head, I wondered why after so long we never had a "pregnancy surprise." I had so many friends who had "surprise babies," and most of them weren't even trying like we were. I started to get a little suspicious that there might be a problem.
Flash forward to January of 2009. After much prayer and deliberation, Judah and I decided to move to Alabama to live near his parents. His Dad had made him job offer to work with him in his business, and Judah had always said that he'd love to work for his Dad for a season and learn from his years of experience in business. It was very hard to leave my family, our church family and friends, and our comfortable life in the city, but we felt that this was the best step for us and we were excited about the new adventure and the opportunity to spend more time with Judah's family. So, we rented a U-Haul, packed it to the brim, and made the 28 hour drive from Boston to Mobile. By this point we had become expert packers. In only five years of marriage we had moved from Massachusetts to Africa (via a brief 6 week stint in Mississippi), to New Hampshire, back to Massachusetts, and now to Alabama.
Moving to Alabama opened up other new and exciting opportunities for us. Because the cost of living is so low in Alabama, we were able to build and buy our first house, watching it's construction from the ground up! I decided to go back to school so I enrolled in the University of South Alabama. I took on a very heavy course load, and continued to study full time even through the summers so that I could get as much done as possible in the shortest amount of time. Initially, the reason I did this was because we were still trying to get pregnant and I knew that once the baby came, I would only be able to do one or two classes a semester. I wanted to get as much in as possible before we had children. I had no idea that I'd be able to graduate with a four year degree in two years time by doing this. I really was just trying to cram it all in before a baby came, but in the end, it really worked out in my favor. (It's true, that God's timing is perfect. I graduate with my Bachelor's degree on December 18th of this year, and our baby is due on the following March 19th! I couldn't have planned it better myself!)
The day we moved into our house was bitter sweet. It was wonderful to know that we finally had our first home- a place that was OURS and ours alone. We loved knowing that our money every month was going toward an investment, and that responsibility made us feel like "real adults." But the move into our first home also holds bitter memories because the day that we moved in was the first day that we felt the tangible emptiness in our home. It was evident right away. At first I thought it was just me who noticed how oddly quiet it was, and who felt a nagging feeling in my heart that something was missing. But sitting amongst our cardboard boxes and all the other moving mayhem Judah turned to me and voiced my thoughts exactly. "It's too empty in here! We need some kids so we can fill it up!"
Two days later all of our dreams of family came crashing down when we received the results of our first fertility test.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment